Coming Home Again

“I made a big mistake.”
“About Exeter?”
“Yes, I made a big mistake. You should be with us for that time. I should never let you go there.”
“So why did you?” I said.
“Because I didn’t know I was going to die.”

ChangRae Lee’s “Coming Home Again” is an autobiographical account of the writers own relationship with his mother. In it, he examines his childhood and upbringing after her death. Though the family is Korean, I believe this is one of, if not the only story we have read thus far that transcends the cultural perspective from which it is written. It explores the realities of family relationships, the death of a parent, identity, and home. In the end, however, I believe all of these things accumulate to represent the narrators struggle to cope with the death of his mother, as well as his appreciation of the things she has done to raise him. Much of this was done through the medium of food.

Throughout the story, both Lee’s identity, sense of home, and relationship with his mother are represented by food. In fact, there is an abundance of evidence to support this claim, such as when his mother claims (about the meat) “it needs to bone nearby to borrow its richness” (Lee 2). The duel meaning that the quote implies is that Lee’s mother needs him close by because he provides her with happiness. Each description of the preparation of food symbolizes their relationship. On the other hand, Exeter, the private school to which his mother sent him, was a manifestation of each of their respective guilt. Lee tells of us his mother’s worries about sending him to private school, both after he has come home (evident by the quote above) and before. She grew “nervous and distant” after only 6 weeks in his absence in fear that he would consider her “more and more ignorant” each time he came home (Lee 4). She did not want to lose her son “in either body or spirit” (Lee 3). Really, she was afraid that the physical distance between her and her son would create a similar emotional distance. The narrator focuses a great deal on her guilt over sending him to school because, in her absence, he realizes the great sacrifice she made to build for him a good life.

Food, however, was one of, if not the only thing that could alleviate her worry to some degree. Similarly, food reminded him who he was when he was feeling lost. With reference to his school, he claims “I felt as if I had plunged too deep into the world, which, to my great horror, was much larger than I had ever imagined” (Lee 4). Many of his worries were dispelled when his mother visits him with a cooler of Korean food. He states “And it seemed I couldn’t get enough of it back. I ate and I ate, so much and so fast that I actually went to the bathroom and vomited” (Lee 4). Gorging himself with the food was similar to gorging himself with his sense of home, his identity, and his relationship with his mother. It was his acknowledgement that he missed her and of his love of their relationship. To that end, when he eats, he claims “And beneath the face of her worry, I thought, my mother was smiling” (Lee 5). This symbolism of food explains the reason his mother was so upset when he rejects her food on the day of the school picnic. It symbolized, to her, a deterioration of their relationship that neither of them had control over. This was due in part to her fear that the school would take him from her. Similarly, when he cooks all of the finger dishes to his mother and she cannot eat the, it symbolized, to him, a similar deterioration of her health and thus their time together or their relationship. These two examples of their food induced sadness, however, show just how strong their relationship really was and how much they truly cared for each other. In the end, food was the medium through which their relationship was strengthened and their worries alleviated. Each time he ate, it was like coming home again.

As a side note, this story was one I found myself relating to very frequently. There were many instances I felt I could understand the narrator, though I’m sure this was due primarily to the writing. However, the part that stuck out to me most was the end, when he found out his mother cried after he chose to eat at the school picnic. When I was eight, my parents got divorced. They made a schedule and planned where I would be on which holidays, so on and so forth. So, I was to spend the first thanksgiving after my parents’ divorce with my father and his family. My mother had called me to wish me a happy thanksgiving. It was only years later that my mother told me that, after she had hung up, she broke down in tears. I felt very guilty, despite many of the circumstances being out of my control, especially to an 8 year old version of myself. I suppose one of the points of the story is to illicit sources of both happiness and sadness within those who read it, with respect to their own relationships. It’s supposed to make you appreciate everything you have, which I try to do as often as I can, though it is sometimes very hard. I enjoyed this story very much. 

Edison, New Jersey

I believe Junot Diaz’s “Edison, New Jersey” would fall under the category of “slice of life”. It touches on many different areas of modern life that are not specific to Dominican Americans, though you could probably deduce many that are from this piece. However, my interpretation of the story might be a bit of a stretch, as its roots are in Marxism. I think the author was trying to devalue obsession with money and emphasize the rewards of hard work and doing things because you truly enjoy them. From what I gathered, our narrator was unhappy with his life. He continuously buys lottery tickets and steals from customers, both of which assign a negative connotation to money and material possessions. His life is centered on a principle of uncertainty (much of which has to do with money), making him directionless-ness. Everything he describes carries a negative connotation, even the uncertainties of his life. Such is evident when he and his girlfriend are describing how his day will go. She claims “I see an asshole customer, she murmured. Unbearable traffic. Wayne’s going to work slow, and then you will come home to me” (Diaz 133). He then asks if he will be rich (another reference to money) and she claims that that’s the best she can do. However, throughout the story, the only things that carry a positive connotation are stability, which he lacks. Many of these are things people have worked hard on without money as an incentive. He considers them sturdy and reliable. He describes the making of a pool table as “sophisticated” and claims that people do not understand “the precision of their construct” (129), implying that he truly enjoys assembling pool tables, though he might not be able to accept this because it is not a profitable profession. However, when he is offered a job by his ex-girlfriends father, he does not take it. He also assigns positive connotations to descriptions of the cobblestone of the Incan Roads in the Andes that you “couldn’t put a knife between” or the sewers in Rome that were not replaced until the 1950’s. He claims “that’s the sort of thing I can believe in” (129), as opposed to money, which, when he mentioned it previously, says “Money’s never stuck to me, ever” (129). I think it’s interesting that money, though he desires it so much, only ever carries a negative connotation with reference to the story and his take on life. He steals money, buys his girlfriend things with stolen money, and dislikes people who tip him poorly. However, based on his narrative, money doesn’t seem to be the thing that makes him happy. What makes him happy are the things he considers stable, the hard work of other people.

Tangents: I’m not sure if I was so drawn in by the story because I am from New Jersey and live near all of the places referenced or because the story was so well written, though it is probably the latter. With reference to the style of writing, I thought the use of dialogue (or lack there-of) played a very important role in situating the reader within the text. Because the narrator tells us what is told to him or what he says, we see everything through the lens of the narrator. Tangent: The possibility even exists that he is, at times, an unreliable narrator. Evidence for this exists in the part where he claims “That’s how the boss put it. Delinquent. We knew that’s what the customer called us because the boss didn’t use words like that” (Diaz 129). There is no evidence that the customer called him and Wayne delinquents, but the narrator believes it to be true, and so he tells us. Similarly, we are also unsure of whether or not he “got some”. He leaves any details about sexual encounters with the girl out of his narrative, but tells Wayne, when asked, that he did, claiming he has “no reason to lie about that”. I think this may have been done, in terms of the Marxist perspective, in order to demonstrate that we cannot trust him when he expresses a desire for money and to escape his current situation, though I am not sure. Lastly, there is the reference to Edison, Nj that I'm not quite sure what to make of. There is the fountain in Edison of light dispelling darkness (the picture), but I'm not really sure I'm equipped enough to speculate on that yet.

Viramontes

Helena Maria Viramontes' "The Cariboo Cafe" depicts, from all angles, the struggle of Mexican immigrants. In the process, it inspects many of the elements that are applicable to people who do not fall under this category, such as "good" and evil, loss, and compassion. My favorite thing about this story, however, was the way in which it was written. The use of narrative and voice is extraordinarily complex. In truth, this was one of the things that made a bit confusing and difficult to follow. With that in mind, I think there is much to be said about possible motivations with respect to the narrative.

Viramontes writes the story from three different perspectives, establishing a context for each and then aggressively alternating between perspectives. The first is a third person narrative, which follows Sonya and her brother, Macky. The second is the owner of the Cariboo cafe who, despite the rough exterior the voice of his narrative portrays, seems to genuinely care about many people, including strangers. The last is the first person narrative of a women who has lost her son, Geraldo. I think Geraldo (or Macky?) is a very important figure in the story, primarily because he is the only character throughout the story who is given three separate names- one for each narrative. In the first, under the care of Sonya, he is Macky. To the owner of the Cariboo cafe, he is Short Order, and to the women who believes that he is her child, he is Geraldo. I think this, in combination with the aggressive alternation of the narratives, suggests that the people in the story are interchangeable. These problems are not specific to one family, or even specific at all. The constantly shifting narrative keeps the reader on their feet, always asking who is telling the story and who is being spoken about when in reality, in the context of the immigration problem, it could apply to any immigrant who is suffering in this manner. This is supported when the women is first looking for her child, Geraldo. The narrator claims "The women came up from the depths of sorrow to search for their children. I join them" and that she "hears the wailing of the women and knows it to be her own" (Viramontes 72-73). Both of these quotes support the idea that she is one of many people facing the same struggle, which is, in this case, losing their children to police officers fighting illegal immigrants. More evidence to support this concept stems from quotes that make characters vague or interchangeable. For example, the narrator claims "as time passed, buses came less frequently, and every other person seemed to resemble popi" (Viramontes 66). The fact that the women and the cafe owner are not given names further support the same idea.
 As an end / side note, this story reminds me of an anime (I'm a closet anime fan) called Baccano, which plays with narrative and voice in a similar manner, switching vigorously between protagonists, and even points in time, making it very difficult to watch and grasp after one try. One of the points made in the very beginning (or end) of the show is that people should "free themselves from the illusion that stories have beginnings and endings" as well as "main characters". Just some food for thought. Though I'm not sure if the two relate in content, they most certainly relate in their narratives.

Yamamoto

From what I gather, Hisaye Yamamoto’s “Seventeen Syllables” speaks volumes about the struggles of Japanese natives who immigrate to American. I’m not sure in what time period this story takes place, but after a quick Google search, I found that Yamamoto was born in 1921. I think it’s also important to note that she was born in California. She was a second generation immigrant.  During and after the time of her birth, it was very difficult for any Japanese natives to immigrate to America. Rosie’s mother is exemplary of that struggle- she could not move to America without being married to an American citizen. And so, she was wed to a man she didn't really know or love.

 I believe the most important piece of the story to analyze is the social commentary provided on the dichotomy between Rosie, who is a second generation immigrant, and her mother, who is a first generation immigrant. Their relationship, or sometimes lack there-of, symbolizes the disconnections that result from the barriers that rise between first and second generation immigrants, usually pervading in the form of language. Evidence to support such a claim comes from the beginning of the story where it states “Rosie knew formal Japanese by bits and starts, and her mother had even less English, no French. It was much more possible to say yes, yes” (Yamamoto 22). The “Yes, Yes” is something Rosie says to her mother throughout the story when she doesn't fully understand something but does not want to talk about it either, presumably because of the aforementioned barriers (usually language). It almost comes across as passive-aggressive. This lack of connection between Rosie and her mother is introduced very early and left to sit until the ending.

                 The ending was very interesting to me. It exemplified the same struggle between first and second generation immigrants, though not through the medium of language. Instead, the end used the medium of cultural norms to articulate the disconnection between Rosie and her mother. In American, people tend to associate “love” with “marriage”. This is why when Rosie’s mother tells her never to get married, Rosie immediately thinks of Jesus, the person she loves. When her mother is yelling at her, it claims “Jesus, Jesus she called silently, not sure whether she was invoking the help of the son of Carrascos or of God” (Yamamoto 38). (Absolutely brilliant quote, in my opinion). However, Rosie’s mother does not associate “love” with “marriage”, which I believe is a representation of many of Japanese Immigrants. Because she could not marry the person she loved (who also loved her) in Japan due to her low socioeconomic class (a characteristic also usually ignored in America with relation to the concept of love), but instead was forced to marry someone she did not love, she does not make the same association that Rosie does. Because of this cultural barrier, Rosie cannot understand her mother’s take on love and marriage, nor can her mother understand the way a different culture has impacted Rosie’s take. As a result, Rosie, perhaps passive-aggressively or perhaps out of a want to please her mother, pretends to understand her mother’s plea with the phrase “Yes, yes, I promise”.